How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
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