I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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