I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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