May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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