Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
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