It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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