I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
