google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Someone stole a lamp last night.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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