you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
