i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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