whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
