he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vagina is talking i cant
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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