dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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