totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
