You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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