moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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