Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
