I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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