Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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