I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
