they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Randomize
