The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
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