My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
