halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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