I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
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I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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