Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
sarcasm needs its own font
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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