why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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