He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
