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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!

  (1-225): View more from Louisiana

  Wtf?

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Use the slutty part of ur brain.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.

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• (940): View more from Texas

  The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.

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  25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (765): View more from Indiana

  just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me

  (310): View more from California

  maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA

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• (308): View more from Nebraska

  Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.

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  These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever

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• (253): View more from Washington

  Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  "Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae

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