Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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