That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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