when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
