im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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