just come out here and I will go home with you...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
