Christians are straight up FREAKS
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
