I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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