I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Randomize
