It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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