I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
