There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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