I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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