Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
did i walk over a car last night?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
