she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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