I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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