when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So vagazzling was a success
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
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