the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
