TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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