lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
