I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
