She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize